Hollywood stars are not going to use this secret trick

Yesterday was my birthday. I realize this morning that 59 is old. When there's leftover pie, you might as well eat some for breakfast. You may not get another chance.

Not that I am going to go completely crazy, but this is a time to loosen the rules a little. It occurs to me I am never going to look like Hugh Jackman, and that's okay. While I'm sure Mr. Jackman is an affable and decent fellow, and very talented, a big part of his job is looking good for a living. Thus he sacrifices, and he has an army of people to advise him about what he eats, wears and how much and how often he exercises.

I woke up at five this morning to write. There's nothing particularly virtuous about it; it was just that I'd slept long enough and there was nothing I wanted to do more than get started in my study.

A more disciplined man would start the day with a 3-mile run or a grapefruit, both of which would improve my chances of getting into last year's pants. Though I'll take some time for physical activity later today, it isn't my first priority at this point in my life, and I'm not going to be slavish or self-sacrificial about it.

I asked for a birthday pie, and Vicki is so kind and sweet that she made one, marionberry, my favorite, and it might have been her first. The filling was soupy, but you could spoon it over the crust and it was delicious.

I'm having a wedge for breakfast, and if Hugh Jackman is in the neighborhood, he can run over and have some too.

A good death

My sister is dying of cancer. She has two tumors in her chest, inoperable, and it has spread to her lymph nodes. The doctor gave her two years, and four months of that is spent.

K_____ is 15 years younger than me, the youngest of seven. Though my parents are both passed, she's the first of my siblings to face death, and she's doing so with a courage, dignity and strength that I marvel at.

She has 3 daughters, ages 11, 16 and 22, two grandchildren and a loving husband. She's made it a priority to seize the time she has left, enjoying every walk and dinner and night on the town for ice cream.

Her funny, thoughtful Facebook messages have been an inspiration to family and friends. She's gathered a community of Love around her, truly living rather than waiting to die. Middle daughter Tia is six feet tall and graceful, growing to be a beautiful young lady. She's a sophomore, trying to make the varsity basketball team. My sister has one, maybe two more seasons to watch her, and plans to cheer on every dribble and swish.

Friends drop off meals for her family. Trips to town in the small community where she lives are a hug-a-thon. She remembers to thank her nurses.

My sister's hope and optimism rests not in elusive miracles but in the commonplace ones: she's focused on living and enjoying her family and saying a long good good-bye.

Though I don't want to lose her, I marvel at the light, energy and joy she is sending out to the world around her.

The perks of being human

"But even if we don't have the power to choose where we came from, we can still choose where we go from there. We can still do things. And we can feel okay about them."

      --Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower

Daily affirmation, November 11, 2014

Today I resolve to live stronger and let go of fear.

Beginning in this moment I will choose action over anxiety and gratitude over frustration.

I am a thankful, abundant, joyous, energized person, and that is how I choose to live.

Today I resolve to find the opportunity in my obstacles, and the hope in my challenges.

I will move, live, breath, and exercise with appreciation and thankfulness.

I will dance and hear the music. I will hold my friends and family close.

This is my one life. I am so grateful that it begins again today.

Daily Thankfulness, November 11th, 2014

I am thankful for joy and abundance. I am thankful for hope.

I am thankful for the fall colors, the changes and rhythms of the seasons, how they invite us to be quiet and reflective, more accepting of the changes and transitions in our lives.

I am thankful for a nutritious, simple lunch.

I am thankful for health, energy and activity.

I am thankful for books and their ability to transport and inspire me. I am thankful for inspiration, creativity and the pursuit of understanding and clarity.

I am thankful for my family and friends.

I am thankful for the opportunity to write and the challenge to grow. I am thankful for new beginnings.

photo from my long-time friend Jodene Rudolf, from her Facebook page.